We have all, at one point or another, poisoned our
own happiness, whether it be through worry, fear,
or just poor decision making. Life can certainly
throw a person into a tailspin but the real culprit
isn’t the adversity, it’s how we perceive and
respond to the adversity that determines the
outcome. Sometimes it is simply a matter of wrong
motives in life that can lead us down the
venomous path, rather than the path that leads to
the antidote.
1. Your jealousy can ruin any relationship.
Your better off dealing with jealousy head on when
it rears its ugly head. Most people don’t want to
admit when they have been bitten by the green-
eyed monster but it can happen from time to time.
There are people who exude jealousy to the point
that it ruins relationships. It usually stems from
feelings of inadequacy, and those are the things
that a person must take a hard look at in order to
salvage their relationships. A happy person is one
who is free from jealousy and it shows in healthy
relationships.
2. Your desire for superficial things in life can
poison happiness.
It is often said that the happiest people are those
who do more for others, rather than themselves. If
your the type of person that pursues the superficial
things of life: wealth, cars, name brand clothes,
etc. then it is safe to say that you are poisoning
your own happiness in life. The desire of the
perfunctory will only lead to more dissatisfaction
because our brain is hard-wired at a threshold for
such things; it’s called hedonistic adaptation.
Living a life of modesty will bring you more
happiness in the long run.
3. Your grudge-holding will destroy your
happiness.
I once knew a man who held a grudge against his
father for leaving the family. His grudge festered
within him like a cancer and destroyed any hope of
his living life to the fullest. The Stoic philosophers
believed that some things are out of our control, so
in short, they aren’t worth worrying over or trying
to fix. Happiness comes from moving forward in
your life and letting go of grudges that would hold
you back.
4. Your regrets in life will destroy your peace.
Your life most certainly will be filled with regrets
from time to time; I call them mistakes. Mistakes
are only there to teach you that a certain path has
ended and so it is time to try another. There’s no
use in looking back in regret, because you cannot
change the past. Simply move forward and try
another road. You will most certainly be happier for
it.
5. Your dependence on others will hinder
happiness.
If you are dependent person or to use another
phrase, codependent on another person for your
happiness, you will undoubtedly be waiting a very
long time for a happy life. Happiness will never
come to you from another person, it can only come
from within yourself. You can find happiness with
someone within a relationship, but that cannot be
trusted for your own happiness, because at some
point in time, that person will let you down.
Looking within is the only way to true joy.
6. Your need to fix other people will ruin your
happiness.
This ties into co-dependence as well. If you feel
the need to “fix” others, then you will never be
focused on your own well-being and happiness.
When your focus shifts away from the self, you will
always find something that needs to be fixed in
others in order to make you feel happy. The only
person you can control is you; so why not focus
on self-actualization for long-term happiness.
7. Your fear can hold a person back from
experiencing true happiness.
Ralph Waldo Emerson said “Fear defeats more
people than any other one thing in the world.” It
can stem from many places, but you will only
experience true happiness when you release your
fears and simply do the thing your are afraid of
doing.
8. Your selfishness is a poison to your happiness.
If your a selfish person, it means you always want
things your way and others’ needs and opinions
are often discarded in the process. Most people do
not want to be in relationship with a selfish person
and if this describes you, you may just find
yourself alone and unhappy if it is not changed.
Take a good look at yourself and examine areas of
your life that have fallen prey to selfishness and
make the necessary changes; you may find
happiness was waiting for you all along.
9. Your happiness will wane when you set
unreasonably high expectations of others.
Your need for everyone to meet your standards in
life is an unreasonable expectation that most
people will never be able to attain; therefore, you
will most always be disappointed in people and
thus unhappy in life. All people have their own
personality type which will prevent them from ever
being able to live up to what you expect of them.
They cannot do it. When you let go of the
expectation of others to perform to your standards,
you will find that they, as well as yourself, will be
much more elated. A free person is a happy person.
10. Your self-righteous attitude will halt your
happiness.
If your a self-righteous person it means that you
feel you can do no wrong, and that other people
are always in the wrong. I used to attend church
and always felt this type of attitude amongst the
people, which in turn made for a lot of
unhappiness in many of the people’s relationships.
It is impossible to be perfect all of the time, so
why not do drop your self-righteousness and
experience true happiness. Not only will your
relationships flourish but you will be a much more
relaxed individual.
11. Your living in the past will hinder happiness.
If your living in the past, it means that you are
unhappy with the present. Your happiness is a
current state of mind and if your life is not making
you happy, then maybe it is time to examine your
situation and makes some changes for the better.
Maybe you need a new career goal? Maybe it’s
time to finish a project you’ve been putting off?
Whatever the case, moving forward in life will help
you feel that you are living in the “now.”
12. Your dishonesty can dampen happiness.
If you are a dishonest person, chances are you
have alienated yourself from others. Often times,
people who are dishonest gain the reputation as
someone who cannot be trusted; therefore, they are
seen as an unfaithful friend and partner. Alienating
yourself through dishonesty will surely lead to
unhappiness and isolation.
13. Your substance use alters states of happiness.
Some may disagree but even if you use substances
for temporary states of “happiness” it will be short-
lived and once the high wears off, your feelings of
unhappiness will be there, staring you in the face.
Even for those who use chocolate and caffeine as
means of escape, must admit that the euphoria is
short-lived.
14. Your pessimism leads to perpetual moods of
unhappiness.
It is thought that if you are the type of person that
always has the pessimistic attitude it can lead to a
life of unhappiness. In a sense, your words and
thoughts have power to them and if you constantly
use “negative talk” it’s like sending negative vibes
out into the world. Thus, unhappiness appears to
follow you around like a virus that won’t go away.
The medicine for pessimism is to become aware of
your negativity and work to change your thoughts
and words for the better. Read, exercise, take up a
hobby, whatever you need to feel better about
yourself is worth a try.
15. Your prejudice of other people can make you
unhappy with yourself.
You would think that if someone is prejudiced
against a group of people, it means they are
unhappy with that group but quite the opposite is
true. A prejudiced person is often an unhappy
person, spewing their unhappiness onto a
“scapegoat” group of people. Prejudiced people
look for instances in which to unleash their fury
onto others. They think it will somehow make them
feel better, but it won’t. If you find that you are
prejudiced (and we do all have certain prejudices),
it may be time to sit down and really take stock in
yourself and confront these issues head on; you
will be glad you did.
16. Your self-doubt can lead to feelings of
unhappiness.
If you doubt yourself consistently, it would stand
to reason that it will lead you to feelings of
unhappiness. A self-doubter may engage in
negative self-talk which leads to deeper and
deeper feelings of unhappiness. It’s a vicious cycle
that needs to be addressed with a close friend or
counselor who may be able to help you through
these feelings. Maybe finding a positive outlet in
which to volunteer your time can boost your self-
worth as well, and take your mind off yourself for a
change.
17. Your unhappiness can stem from unchecked
mental health.
If you suffer from anxiety or depression, it isn’t
hard to figure that unhappiness follows. What
causes these mental imbalances? Often the society
we engage in daily is enough to send anyone into
states of unhappiness by way of anxiety and other
mental illnesses. Sometimes there are more serious
issues at hand but unhappiness is robbed all the
same. Take time and talk with someone in whom
you trust who can help you sort through life’s
mishaps. When in doubt seek professional help.
18. Your pet can help ward off happiness poisons.
Pets are a wonderful way to boost your happiness.
If you are someone who doesn’t like or doesn’t
want a pet, think about volunteering at a place
with animals or some other outlet in order to
introduce yourself to the appropriate ways to
interact with pets. It has been found that when
petting an animal, a person’s mood automatically
lifts.
19. Your ability to volunteer your time to the needy
can help you become happier.
Giving your time to those in need will help cure the
unhappiness in your life. Sometimes seeing those
less fortunate than yourself helps put things in
perspective.
20. Your stress can prevent happiness in your life.
Stress is not only unhealthy for your physical well-
being but emotional as well. If you are the type of
person who has constant stress in your life, it may
be time to make drastic changes. Take inventory of
your life and get rid of the unnecessary. Living a
life of simplicity can sometimes be just the thing
you need to prevent stress and improve your
happiness.
I hope you find these insights to be of use in your
life. If you find that your happiness is being
poisoned, maybe one of these tips is the culprit. In
any case, seek happiness from within. Meditate,
read, pray, exercise, whatever you need to improve
yourself, and happiness is sure to follow.
source
No comments:
Post a Comment